As I stand here today, on the precipice of the journey back to Colorado I reminisce about the past year. I’m not the same man I was when I moved out here. I think I’m a little less scared, a lot more confident in myself and I feel like I could handle anything. I definitely walk and talk a little faster and have adopted some of the traits of a New Yorker. I had more of a West Coast outlook and attitude before coming here. That hasn’t completely gone away but I’ve picked up the drive and determination of a hard working East Coaster. Since living here I’ve been enveloped in a 24/hr work culture..for better or worse it has rubbed off on me. I’m going to miss New York’s unique charms. Every ethnic group has their own little patch of land in the city where you can brush against their vibrant culture that hasn’t been diminished and diluted by generations of existing in the melting pot. You can do and see just about anything here. The super-wealthy live just miles from the extremely poor. And everything is bigger and better here. The best and brightest all live here, competing with each other in the race to the top. New York is truly the center of the universe, our Rome.
I don’t regret moving here. The opportunities given to me have been immense and I feel like I’m leaving with more than what I’ve arrived with. That being said, I’m looking forward to taking a deep breath, stepping back and taking a moment to relax. I don’t think New Yorkers realize how difficult it is to live here. I think the memories of short lines, quick travel and more space have been forgotten even to me. I miss being able to see green outside my front door instead of going to Central Park. I miss having time to myself for my own artistic endeavors. I miss having time to just hang with my friends and share a beer without worrying about making my train or getting an emergency call from work.
Competitiveness is a good thing but they take it to the extreme here.
It was tough today saying farewell to people but I like to think of it more as I’ll see you soon than goodbye.
New York, I love you but the time wasn’t right for us. If I had come here in my early twenties things would be different. You would have been perfect. I mean it in all sincereness when I say it’s not you, it’s me. My time here will always be a part of me but I never truly felt like this was my home….it always felt like an extended vacation. I’ll be back to visit but my home and heart belong elsewhere. So long, New York. We’ll see each other again soon.